sex & relationships

Why I don’t feel the love this Valentine’s Day

‘I feel it in my fingers, I feel it in my toes…’ Valentine’s fever is all around and I think I’m going to boke.

‘I feel it in my fingers, I feel it in my toes…’ Valentine’s fever is all around and I think I’m going to boke. Yes, it’s that time of year again—shops are filled with single red roses and heart-shaped confectionary, while generic Valentine’s albums are released in droves.

St Valentinus would have beheaded himself if he could see the merciless consumerism that parades under his name.

Centuries of Suffering

Can you tell I’m not feeling the love? I’m not the only one.

Since Charles Duke of Orleans sent the first Valentine’s card to his wife from the Tower of London in 1415, men—and these days women too, are badgered, bribed and blackmailed by commercial conglomerates to buy their other half all the tat this holiday inspires.

The date is aptly named as the anguish of finding the right card for that special someone closely resembles the suffering Saint V. endured himself as he was imprisoned, clubbed and stoned. Poor guy.

Statistics suggest that the 14th February ignites the ‘Divorce Season,’ with divorce filings rising as much as 40 per cent after this day. It also sees the beginning of the period with the highest number of suicides. A heart-breaking 75 per cent of Valentine’s suicide-attempts are down to relationship issues.

It is no coincidence that Single Awareness Day, which also falls on February 14th, spells SAD. At least Hallmark is laughing, after reeling in a £360 million profit from the holiday.

Expensive Gifts of No Worth

Contrary to what this article may suggest, I am not in fact a bitter singleton but have been in a wonderful relationship for almost two years. So why am I so riled? I believe Valentine’s Day completely undermines the complexities of real love and turns it into a competition to see who can spend the most on things we don’t need.

My boyfriend and I currently live 175 miles away from each other, which is certainly not easy at times. This has taught me more about love than some generic card ever could. Instead of splashing out on designer fragrances or elaborate bouquets of flowers, we have decided to simply spend the weekend together. When you see so little of someone, there is no time for clichéd gimmicks. Every second counts.

Don’t get me wrong—I would love to receive an extravagant present, or be whisked away for a luxury weekend for two. A previous boyfriend bought me a delectable perfume set one Valentine’s Day. It was one of the nicest fragrances I have ever smelled but he just didn’t get it.

Instead of telling me how he felt, he had bought an expensive gift of no worth. And that is exactly what is wrong with Valentine’s Day.

If you love someone, let it be known. If you appreciate someone, prove it. Why wait until a specific day to show your loved ones you care?

So, as you tuck in to your heart-shaped choccies from your beau, my boyfriend and I will probably be snuggled up watching Netflix. And I couldn’t be happier about it.

What do you think about Valentine’s Day? Have your say in the comments section below.

Image: Marc Tasman